This Sunday, the 18th of August, is International Never Give Up Day. With the organisers calling it a reflection on the power of perseverance and dedication, and ‘a time for individuals to reflect on their own journey,’ I thought I would celebrate by sharing my own story.
If you had told me two years ago to “never give up!” or anything along those lines, I must admit I probably would’ve told you to go away. I was diagnosed as autistic when I was 16, and the years leading up to this could only be described by one word: struggle. Everything was a struggle. My mental health, school, socialising, simply getting out of bed in the morning; it was all hard. “Never give up” would’ve been the last thing I wanted to hear, because I felt like things would never get any better. When you’re struggling with your mental health, it is really hard – almost impossible – to envision a future where you’re happy. When you’re having meltdowns every day and battling self-harm, you can’t imagine a time where you won’t feel this bad.
Now two years on, I am content with my life. I am happy. I honestly would’ve never even thought these words would come out my mouth.
It didn’t happen overnight though. After my autism diagnosis, my family and I made big changes. Firstly, we started making accommodations. My parents told me to wear my ear defenders, bring my fidgets, be open about my autism; and it made my daily life easier. The first step of my diagnosis for me, was acceptance. We also shifted our mindset, which was the most beneficial change. I no longer feel over-sensitive; I am now resilient. I am not a failure; I am determined. There is not something wrong with me; I am autistic.
Even now, having made these changes to how I view myself, it is still not easy. It doesn’t mean that everything miraculously got better. My mental health still fluctuates, however I am now equipped to deal with it. I still struggle with challenges relating to autism, anxiety and trauma. I still get flashbacks and nightmares from my time at school, and I get overwhelmed by memories of the past. The bottom line is that it is not easy being autistic.
But to me, working through this to feel proud and safe in your identity, is the definition of never giving up.
In the last year, I have volunteered with charities, got a job, overcame challenges like travelling to new cities and spending my first night away from home and – most importantly – I did things I enjoy. After such a hard time the last few years, I made sure to make time for myself to both have fun and relax. Now, I am three weeks away from moving to university, studying a course I love, and feeling proud of how far I have come. With such a big milestone up ahead, I have been reflecting on my journey and how I have never given up. I wanted to share my story in the hopes it would reach other autistic people and their families, and they could see part of their story in mine.
There are many social impacts, created by Never Give Up Day, that I would hope to foster with my blog: community building – I hope for my blog to bring people together within the autism community; reduction of stigma – by talking about my experiences I want to make autism more talked about, to increase understanding and empathy; long-term empowerment – I want other autistic young people to feel that their voices are heard and that they should speak up on issues relevant to them; and finally, inclusivity and diversity – everybody should know that all brains are extraordinary, and uniqueness should be celebrated!
I am autistic 